trying to conciliate those two people who are me

I'm feel as if something is missing in my life but I can't identify where that kind of feeling comes. This might arise because I'm trying to give all of me but I awfully feel that such thing is not enough...

Eventhough I'm slightly feeling empty, I ought to listen to myself and keep continuing with my plan, otherwise I will get mad or worst I will regret it for the rest of my life. Nevertheless, I miss my older me who was at university and didn't care about a lot of thing... but my newest me is more aware of life, actually that might be the reason wich causes all these emotions.